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Friday, September 14, 2007

Know Your Right-Wing Shills

One of the more frustrating things about politics for is me the sheer mendacity of right-wing shills. As a college student, I am appalled with some of the bullshit that flies around in political discourse, because so much of it would get a college student expelled for academic dishonesty. Sean Hannity is one of the worst shit slingers, but Sean is so stupid that it's sometimes hard to tell if he knows that he's wrong (and lying to his audience).

I get the sense from some right-wing shills, like Tucker Carlson or Bill O'Reilly, that they are actually intelligent people who are willing to be dishonest to "win" an argument. With Hannity, he just isn't smart enough to figure out when he is being lied to by other shills. Click "There's More..." and follow me below the jump.


Hannity's schtick is waving the flag and calling liberals and Democrats any of a number of variations of "America hater." He has a show on Fox News called "Hannity's America," a title that practically makes me gag when I see it on the cable guide. On this show Hannity has a couple recurring segments that I've been unfortunate enough to watch on the intertubes. The first is called "The Clinton Files" where he rehashes all the fake, made up controversies from the 90's. Perhaps he's just nostalgic for a president that he could attack. It's just as stupid as you would imagine, as Hannity investigates whether Bill and Hillary are the two most powerful people on earth, and how they use their awesome power to murder and silence critics, advance the liberal agenda, and be just all around bad people. I imagine that the script is written in all capital letters.

The second recurring segment is even more ludicrous. It was called "Enemy of the State," until somebody told Hannity that it made him look like a huge fascist. Now it's called "Enemy of the Week." Hannity uses this segment to call out unamerican subversives, with all the wit and truthfulness that you would expect. It's pretty much exactly what a satire of Hannity's show would look like, except that he thought of it first. Recipients of this "award" include popular right-wing targets Michael Moore, Barbara Streisand, and Jane Fonda. My favorite was Sean Penn, who was the "Enemy of the State" for, well, expressing an opinion and calling Hannity a name (idiot, I think). Hannity responds maturely by calling Penn names.

But enough about Hannity's shitty shows. Lets get to the heart of what makes him a right-wing jerk-off. Hannity doesn't come up with his stuff by himself. He relies on the tried and true right-wing information network to generate material for him. The RNC makes something up, it goes up on Drudge, and voila, Hannity's got something to talk about. After the smear hits the airwaves it's debunked, and responsible people explain how the GOP twisted the facts. But Hannity's like a pitbull, and he never lets go to a smear once he sinks his teeth into it.

Hannity is so stupid, in fact, that he doesn't even know he's lying sometimes. For instance, I remember during the 2004 election, the RNC put out a press release saying that John Kerry "voted for higher taxes 350 times." So Hannity dutifully parroted this attack ad nauseum, except, he didn't get the full memo. You see, "voting for higher taxes" included a number of things besides raising taxes. In fact, everytime Kerry voted against some bullshit GOP tax cut, that counted. But Hannity didn't understand or recognize the distinction, and would constantly say that Kerry "voted to raise taxes 350 times." He probably didn't even realize, or he did and he didn't care.

There are countless other examples of Hannity simulatenously playing the village idiot and right-wing shill. Check out Media Matters for more (they have 750 listed), and feel free to put your favorite in the comments.

I find Hannity quite tiresome, and I don't know why anyone would listen to what he has to say. If I were a right-winger, I wouldn't listen to him because I'd be worried that I'd repeat what he said and get called out for being an idiot. I can't possibly imagine why people listen to him. But then again, I'm not this guy.


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